November 30, 2010

December

Can you feel it?  


The old month falling away from us, and the last of the year spreading itself out like a blanket to surround us?  It's almost here, my lovelies, 


The End Of 2010. 


To begin with, I love the start of a new month, it's like a little New Years for me, every 28 (give or take) days.  Which, by the way, is my favorite part of December.  I LOVE New Years Eve.  Just the whole concept of it...a fresh beginning for everyone, the elusive Midnight Kiss (which I'm still waiting for), the fireworks, and the ball dropping.  Everyone happy, waiting, expecting something to happen.  I feel like, at the start of a new year, everyone is at their best, believing that this year is going to be the one, the one that holds something N E W, something special, something better than last year.  Call me crazy, or romantic, or whatever adjective you so choose, but I  L O V E it.  


Are you ready, friends?  It's almost here...

What's your favorite holiday, loves???
<3
Cinquain Poetry with five lines. Line 1 has one word (the title). Line 2 has two words that describe the title. Line 3 has three words that tell the action. Line 4 has four words that express the feeling, and line 5 has one word which recalls the title.

Winter
Impossibly cold
Sweeping over everyone
Bringing sadness and regret
Winter

(I hope I did that right)  
So I wrote this yesterday, but never got a chance to post it.  Sorry about that. :-/  But here it is now, an also, here's today's! 


Ghazal A short lyrical poem that arose in Urdu. It is between 5 and 15 couplets long. Each couplet contains its own poetic thought but is linked in rhyme that is established in the first couplet and continued in the second line of each pair. The lines of each couplet are equal in length. 

I stood on my own, feeling the breeze blow past,
Bringing with it, the memories of my own past.

I stood on the sands of a beach, when at last,
I remembered a moment, from years in my past.

I walked to the ocean, feeling it surround me like a cast,
And recalled certain feelings, blown to me from my past.


Okay, a) I know those lines aren't all the same length, and b) I know that's less then 5 couplets.  I'm having a lot of trouble with this one, just because I can not find enough words that I can use which rhyme with past. I might come back to it later, and try to add the last two couplets...

<3

November 28, 2010

Us

So nobody left me any suggestions for a poetry form.  :(  I even gave you guys an extra day!  But o well, I went through the list, and decided on a Nonet - a 9-line poem, where the first line has 9 syllables, second line has 8 syllables, and so on.  
Lying beside the lilac bushes,
she looked like she was just sleeping.
It was beautiful, almost,
with the grass still growing -
everything's okay.
Nothing's changing,
And always,
we'll be:
Us.  
I know that was pretty bad...  The syllables were giving me trouble.  Also, my best friend Mary just made a blog.  Definitely check it out - I promise, it's full of awesomeness! 
<3

November 26, 2010

Broken Chains

So today's going to be the first day of my one-week project.  Like I mentioned 
the other day, I'm going to pick the poetry form for today.  If you guys want to 
suggest one for tomorrow, let me know in the comment box!  The sites I'm 
using are here and here.  My only rules are that I won't do a Ballad (have 
you ever read Beowulf? The idea of writing that is terrifying!), and I won't do the same form twice.  So anyways, here's today's form.

Etheree - consists of 10 lines of 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10 syllables.  
Etheree can also be reversed and written 10, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.


Broken Chains
Without his angered gaze upon her, she felt brand new.
The lack of a fear she'd known so long,
made her feel like she was finally free -
like the chains he'd held so tightly
had finally broken, after so long.
For perhaps the first time,
in what seemed like
her entire life,
she can
move.
<3

November 25, 2010

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving all!!
Today, I am thankful for my friends, for making it to 19yearsold, and for my wonderful cat, Kitty.  <3 (even though she makes me look like I have pink eye)
What are you thankful for?  Let me know in the comment box! 
<3

PS.  I'm not posting any writing today because of the holiday.  Sorry :(  I'll have more of that for you guys tomorrow!

November 24, 2010

For One Week

Today, while sitting at my laptop attempting to squeeze the creativity out of my skull, I thought of an idea.  Lately, I've been having trouble thinking of anything to write, probably because my plan of writing something every day backfired on me.


So for the next week, I'm going to look up a different type of poetry each day, and attempt to write that. 


So upon making this decision, I found a site that lists 51 different forms of poetry.  For today, I'm going to pick the type.  After today though, I'm asking you guys, the readers to choose a form for me.  My only rules are that it can not be an Epic Poem (Have any of you ever read Beowulf?  It's terrifying), and I won't do the same form twice. 


I am doing this 1-week project for 2 reasons: 
  1. I'm hoping that it will help me to write
  2. To teach me different types of poetry, as I usually don't even use any form
So I'm going to go write today's poem, and I'll post later with the form, and the poem.  Be excited! :)
<3


PS.  For any of you out there reading, that like to write - JOIN ME!  It's going to be fun, and I'd love to see what you guys come up with :)

November 22, 2010

An Ode To A City

I am the city streets, paved not with gold but instead with the hopes and dreams of so many before you.  I am the honking of horns that fills the night, and scattered conversations that lull you to sleep from fifteen stories below your window.  I am the almost forgotten art posted on every street corner, the signs advertising "up and coming" molded to every brick and piece of stucco.  I am the city lights, illuminating every corner and every apartment window long after you've gone to bed.  I am the city, staying awake long after you've said your good-nights.  I am the city, anonymous and always there, long after everyone else has gone. 
I changed the layout and such of my page.  What do you guys think?  Let me know in the comment box!
<3

November 21, 2010

It Was Only A Dream

     It was a dream.  I know that.  But goddamn, it felt so real.
     And you were there.  I remember you so distinctly, so clearly…  Amidst a sea of white, and clamoring, and indistinct, unrecognizable voices, there was you.  Just sitting there…watching me.  And you made it all seem manageable.  Like those voices, and that white emptiness…it was all gone.  Just silence.  And just you, and just me.  Just us.  The way it used to be, I guess.
     I think you wanted to say something, but I don’t know what it was.  What was it?
And holy shit the feelings that came rushing at me when I saw you…  I know it was a dream.  But those feelings…I still feel them, now, awake, talking about it.
They all hit me, like one of those waves you don’t see coming, the kind that knocks you down hard, and makes you realize how incredibly insignificant you are, but you know you have to get back up, you have to keep going because this can’t possibly be all there is in store for you. 
     I was…apathetic…incredibly, uncontrollably apathetic.  But there was this deep…I don’t know how to explain it…sense of love.  Like it was the last time I’d ever feel it in my life.  Like it was the last time ever, for anyone.  Like somehow this, somehow you had changed the course of mine, and everyone else’s futures.  And sadness because of that realization. 
     And I don’t know what else…feelings that nobody ever put words to, because words can’t possibly describe them.  But they were there.  I still feel them.
     And everything was so white…and you were so damn far away.  Like the more I wanted to touch you, the more I tried to reach for your hand, the further you were.  Like I’d never reach you.  (Is that metaphorical?)  But you were just sitting there, waiting for me to come to you, giving me this look like why aren’t you coming to get me?  But it was all so WHITE.  Christ, it was blinding.  It was all I could do to see you, to keep my eyes open and keep watching you, because looking away didn’t seem like an option.
     Because there you were.  Right in the middle of it, just sitting in it.  Just like you always were.
     And it was a dream, I know that.  But damn, it was so real… It was the first time I’ve seen you in years.  And I think I need to admit that it’s likely the last, because if I’m being honest with myself, it was just a dream…and you’re still gone.  
<3

November 20, 2010

That Point in the Night

It's that point in the night where you're not asleep, but you're not awake either. You passed tired a large pizza split between five friends and three games of Uno ago.  Now you're at that point where you might not be able to sleep even if you tried.  And you want to go to sleep, on some level, but you can't make yourself move, because you'll feel left out of something - like the day has given you this gift, and you can't waste it.


It's that point in the night where the day splits in two, and you start to think that what happened a few hours ago, was yesterday.  Everything's fuzzy, but in a way, you remember it all clearly, because in a way, it was all important.  And you know you'll never remember it in the morning, but right now, you can't imagine ever forgetting it.  


It's that point in the night, where lines blur, and the difference between what you're seeing and what you're dreaming isn't clear.  It's a mixed version of some new reality that you never want to end.  
____________________________


Okay, so I just added to what I wrote last night.  Every time I read over what I wrote, I felt like it was so abrupt, and I know that's because I was exhausted last night when I wrote it.  So even though it might not be that good at all, at least I can tell myself I finished it.  Whatever "it" is.


So I'm working on making a page with links to other blogs for you guys to check out.  The page is called "Looking for more to read?" and it's at the top of the page.  If you want more information, go check the page out. :)
<3



Late Night

Sorry for not posting over the last 2 days - they were pretty busy days.  But, I'm back now, and I have some writing from last night for you.  (I wrote it when I got back from the dinner and party we went to, so by then I was too tired for blogging)


It's that point in the night where you're not asleep, but you're not awake either. You passed tired a large pizza split between five friends and three games of Uno ago.  Now you're at that point where you might not be able to sleep even if you tried.  
I know it's not a lot.  Actually, it's more like nothing, but I started out this project knowing that some days would be like that.  Where the most I can come up with is more like nothing.  


I'll post again later with today's writing.  
Until then, leave me some love, and enjoy your weekends!
<3

November 17, 2010

We Are Siamese, If You Please

Today, I wrote a letter to one of my best friends from home.  In it, among other things, I talked about how much I want a Siamese cat.  


And that got me to thinking, what would I name my kitty?  In the past, I've had a Max (I didn't name him.  My parents did), Jingle (somewhat long story for a parenthesis...it was Christmas, and I was watching a show about an elf named Jingle. I'll end it at that.), Giggles (because I have a serious case of the giggles, at all times), Phoebe (named after my favorite character from Friends), and Boo (we got her from a woman my mom works with, so she already had a name when we got her.  This is the cat I still have right now.) There was also Snowball and Snowflake, but those were names my brother and I came up with for 2 cats who were brothers, based on the fact that it was winter when we got them.  So, my cats' names usually have a minor meaning, albeit a meaningless one, if that makes sense.  


Normal people think about names for their future children.  I think about names for my future cats.  Does that serve as proof that I'm destined to become a crazy cat lady?  Perhaps, but I'm not concerned.  













This is my kitty that I have now. Boo. Isn't she pretty? She's good at posing for my camera.  :)


Hmmm...as for writing, I may be back later with that...  I'm pretty blocked today, though.  So I make no promises.  Leave me some love in the comment box! <3

November 16, 2010

Remember When We Were Young

"Fall on me.  Tell me everything you want me to be.  Forever with you.  Forever in me.  Ever the same."
- Rob Thomas 

Driving home today, this is what my friends and I listened to. 
My birthday/Thanksgiving is a week from this Thursday, and this Friday night, my 3 best friends at school and I are going out to dinner and a party, which I'm really excited for! :)  So tonight we went to the local mall so that I could get an outfit.
I miss this.  Already.  

Us, driving down the highway at 3am, listening to our favorite song on your iPod on replay.  Screw shuffle, it's that point in the night where you're so stuck in the moment that you never want it to end, and you'll do anything to make it last.  That's where we're at right now.  

We're not even talking, just singing along, making the seconds stretch for hours and we're the only ones on the road, driving to who knows where.  But where doesn't matter anyway, as long as we get there together, and wake up with the sunrise in our window, the 2 of us, the way it's been for so long now.

And suddenly, so quickly and fleetingly I'm almost not sure it was there, I miss this.  Like I know that one day, it's going to be over, and we're going to look back on this night and say "remember when we were young."  But by then, we'll of forgotten the name of the song we were listening to, and the time on the dashboard clock won't matter anymore.  The context of the whole situation, and the somehow important conversations we'd had will of been lost in translation.  It'll be a memory, and the realization makes me nostalgic.  

November 15, 2010

Morning Dusk

Night's end coming
stars shining dully through the rain
i laugh in the face of the Man on the Moon
as slowly His bright smile wanes
and a tear falls slowly
vitiating His bright eyes
and He seems to take my hand
and tell me Tomorrow's coming so soon.



November 14, 2010

One Last Time

I can feel the cool sand rush between my toes,
as if it knows where I'm going, and wants to come too.
But the waves continue to crash their way through life,
and I think what they're saying, is it's time to go.
But just one more time, can I lie here and wait?
As of there's something else coming tomorrow,
I'll just lie in the sand, enveloped by summer's promise,
and I'll wait for the tomorrow that I know isn't coming.
I'll wait for whatever comes next, to be washed away by waves,
to mingle with the shells, the sand, the salty tears in the ocean.

Too soon, the weekend's over.  But it was beautiful, sunny and warm.  I hope you were able to get out and enjoy it, yourself. 
There's also something in "other artistic ramblings", if you guys want to check that out. <3

November 13, 2010

I Am Me

I am me - that is, whoever "me" is.
I race with the wind, just to see who wins - 
just to see who makes it first to the finish line.
I am lying in the grass, just to watch the sun shine.


I am period, apostrophe, coma, exclamation point,
I am "let's get the hell out of this joint!,"
while the last buzzer rings,
and everyone runs to collect their things.


I am a rhyme with no reason,
the girl who committed treason
against everything she ever knew,
because she was searching for something brand new.


I am a poem, a paragraph, a rhyme with no home.
I am the music that plays at the end of a show.
I am a girl, a lover, a daughter, a friend.  I am "me", whoever that is.
I am watching the Happy New Year! champagne fizz


I am well aware that that poem meant absolutely nothing.  But a lot of what I write has no meaning, and I guess that's not such a bad thing, right?  Okay...maybe it is sort of bad, but I wrote something, and I'm going to call that enough for today.  

November 11, 2010

Wish You Were Here

I am so blocked right now.  I suppose I knew that that would happen soon, because for the past week or so, every time I'd go to post, I'd write a couple of words, and from there I'd think of something.  But yesterday and today, that hasn't been happening.  So I'm going to cheat.  I'm going to be bad, and post something old that I wrote.

It was the middle of the night.  3:13 am to be exact. 
But that didn’t matter.  She’d woken from her bed, shared with him, and sat straight up in bed, in that quiet, graceful way she had that didn’t wake him.  She’d brushed the sleep out of her eyes, what little was left from the dream she’d been having, and tiptoed out of their bed, into the bathroom attached to their room.  She’d rinsed her face, and dried it with the shirt he’d had laid out for work the next morning.  She’d started to leave the room, but on second thought leaned back and grabbed the locket that had been lying in the otherwise empty soap-dish on the bathtub ledge. 
Then she’d walked out of their room, down the stairs to the basement, to their “laundry room”, which was more of a washer, drier, and make-shift clothes line strung along the ceiling, in the back corner of their basement, next to the litter box.  Next to the washer, she’d grabbed her bag, the one with the reminders of other nights like this sewn, stapled, and pinned on. 
The cat was sitting on the floor by her feet staring up at her.  He had a curious look on his face, seemed to be saying “And where are you going?  Aren’t I invited?”  She’d bent down, picked him up and held him in front of her, had said “No, my little Prince, you stay here this time.  It’s just me tonight.”  Then she’d kissed him, and put him back down on the ground, where he remained, staring up at her still.  “And what about him?  He’s still up there sleeping, you know.”  She’d ignored him, walked back up the stairs, back to their room, back to where he was in bed sleeping. 
She’d walked silently into the closet, the one that creaked if you opened it a certain way, and grabbed the first few things she saw hanging limply, had thrown them into the bag, and walked back out of the closet.  She’d opened her dresser and done the same thing, grabbing haphazardly whatever her hands touched first. 
And then she’d shut the bag, walked over to the bed, kissed him on the forehead, “Exsisto tergum , meus diligo.”  And then she’d slipped the locket under his pillow, walked away, walked out of the room.
And then she’d left, walked outside, into the cold night, gotten into her car, and drove towards the interstate.  She didn’t know where she was going, or when or if she’d be back, but she was going.  It was just one of those feelings, the kind that wakes you up at 3:13 on a Thursday morning, the kind that gets you out of bed and just takes you where it wants to go. 
The kind that ends with a post card signed “votum vos erant hic  -  wish you were here.”
<3 Kiersten

November 10, 2010

Hypocrite

Why did you break down her dreams of flight
when all along it was you perfecting your wings
all through the dark, lonely night?


I wrote this hours ago.  And have spent the last however many hours trying to make it something worth reading.  It's not happening.  Not tonight.  Sorry
<3 Kiersten

November 9, 2010

Literary Descriptions of a Storm

I've searched the world for a simile to describe the way the thunder cracks like a whip, to explain the lightning flashing as though a child found the light switch.  Perhaps the old idea, that the rain pours like so many tears from God's eyes.  
I've sat for hours, trying to imagine a metaphor to explain the way that the storm is a sobbing child, an angry toddler, a warring couple late into the night.  
I've spent long nights awake, dreaming up ways to personify the way the thunder throws her against the wall, an angry lover who learned too much, too soon.  The way the rain punishes us for all the wrongs done to her by someone so far away, someone so far gone.  


I'm not sure how to end this...  I'll work on it more later, probably, but for now this is what I have.  


<3 Kiersten

November 8, 2010

A Simile for Death

Day 6:
It's the feeling that you get watching the water circle to the drain, like a little girl again.  Like it's all rushing away from you, leaving you with nothing but a faint memory of it's once being there.  The feeling of your entire life flushing away before your eyes, and there's nothing you can do the stop it.  


It's like the autumn leaves falling away from the trees.  The cold breeze blowing them away, to different parts of nowhere, of everywhere, of anywhere.  Of nowhere that you'll ever see them again, and if you don't pick them up now, each and every piece, then you'll have to admit that the summer is gone, and the winter is fast approaching.  And there's nothing you can do about it, because you can already feel the snow breathing coldly on the back of your neck.


It's the pit in your stomach, as you sit in the backseat of a yellow taxi, watching your childhood home fall away from you, getting smaller and smaller in the distance.  It's watching your childhood memories flash by your car window at 35 miles per hour, until there's nothing you even recognize left in the rear-view mirror.  And you can't turn around and go back, because you already told them all that you were leaving for good.  


That's what it feels like, your life flashing away before your eyes, and there's nothing you can do but watch it go.  


I don't know why I wrote this...it's what came when I sat down and told myself to write something.
<3 

November 7, 2010

Who, What, Where, When?

Day 5:
Who can I call you?
When you say you have no name
Who can I claim to be?
When you say it's me to blame


What can I say to you?
When there's nothing you haven't heard
What can I try to teach you?
When there's nothing you haven't learned


Where can I take you away to?
When there's nowhere you haven't been
Where can I try to show you?
When there's nothing you haven't seen


When can I finally kiss you?
When you always tell me to wait
When can I finally hold you?
When you tell me it's not our fate


<3

November 5, 2010

Register Number Three

Day 4:
"Okay, and your total's going to be...$19.73."  

She smiled at me, that plaster smile that everyone learns after their first 8 hour shift at the Quick-E-Mart down the street from my apartment.  And years later, when they're starting a family and a new career at a prestigious law firm, they still can't forget it.  It'll become like a habit, her go-to when 8 hours and an angry customer at register number 3 are making her want to run so far away.  Someday, when she's presenting an idea to a new client, she'll flash that smile without even realizing it.  

It's not genuine, not even the least bit.  And it's not taught, either.  It learned, quickly, on the job.  A necessity, like breathing.  It calms, reassures, placates.  And for the rest of her life, that's what it will do, when she least expects it, when she doesn't even realize that she's doing it.

"Have a great day," and she smiles as I pick up my change, and walk away.  


<3

November 4, 2010

It's Raining Again

Day 3:
She pours down in a sorrowful, bitter dervish, surrounding us all for days at a time.  Relentless in her pained search for vindication, she pains us all, making us see what we have only tried to be blind to.  And at the end of it, with the sun fighting it's way back to the front, she leaves us with a  few, final tears and a promise to be back.    


It's raining again.  I can't stand this weather...

<3 


November 3, 2010

Happy Wednesday

Day 2:
"Why don't I know what to write?"  Staring at a blank page, this is what I ask myself.  Outside my window, the insects are gathering, trying to escape the death that they know the night might bring.  Everything's quiet, and if I listen, I can hear the heater humming and the refrigerator cooling the leftover Chinese food I'd ordered for dinner.  I would turn on my music, listen to the swirling of the piano notes thrown together in some sort of beauty, but I know that at this point of the night, it would only distract me.  I'd lose myself in the notes, in the feelings that the composer put into the song, and in the treble clefs floating around my head. So I sit still in the silence, hands poised on the keyboard, listening to the heater hum, and the refrigerator cool.  And then I switch off the desk lamp, and sit that way in the dark, listening to my thoughts, to the voices in my head that are asking me the same, overwhelming question:  "Why don't I know what to write?"


<3 me

November 1, 2010

Day One

Last night, I made a good time of taking photos of all things Halloween that I could find in my dorm room.  This mask was a part of my costume. :)


Day 1 Writing:
Like vagabonds, we wandered the streets, freezing in our costumes and looking for a place to go.  It was late, and with the dark it was getting colder every second.  But we didn't mind - we were enjoying the time, the mystery of where we were going, of where we'd end up.  The mystery of where we'd be at the end of tonight, and of what the first rays of the morning light would have in store for us